Goddess of Light

It's Time for a Change!

2006-07-29T13:28:00.000+08:00

In line with our theme for the July issue of Candy, each of the editors had to make a change. For me, it was making the switch from having my hair straightened to loving my naturally curly locks. My hair has gone through cycles, which is perhaps symbolic of the different stages of my life. In grade school, I kept my thick, curly hair tied back in a ponytail. In high school, I had half my hair chopped off and sported a short ‘do. When I was in third year college, I discovered the miracle of rebond and I had my hair straightened every year for the next four years.

A few months ago, when our beauty editor Jennie joined the Candy team, she kept telling me that I should stop straightening my hair and start loving my natural curls. So when we brainstormed for the July issue and came up with the “It’s time for a change!” theme, she eagerly jumped at the chance to give me a makeover—which also includes makeup tips. (She got mad at me for having the wrong shade of face powder but that’s another story.)

Anyway, I finally agreed and it turned out pretty well, thanks to Jen, Ines, and the staff of Piandre. It took a bit of getting used to, and believe me, it's not so easy to maintain, but it's all good.

Here's what I looked like with straight hair back in 2004...

...and now with curly hair. Which look do you like better?

The reason I decided to write about this experience after such a long hiatus from blogging is because it coincides with all the changes I’ve gone through this year. As I’ve learned, it’s tough to go through changes—whether it’s as small as switching dermatologists or as big as getting a boyfriend. I've also decided to try Multiply for awhile since I can blog and post all my photos at the same time. (Check out my site at http://angelamc23.multiply.com. I'll probably be posting there from now on. But I love this site too—it has served its purpose well for a year so I'm still keeping it.) But as the saying goes, change is a necessary part of life—and I’m all the happier because of it.

Angels Brought Me Here

2006-03-11T11:22:00.000+08:00

"It's been a long and winding journey, but I'm finally here tonight..."

—Guy Sebastian

Our trek of Mt. Pinatubo began just as the sun was peeking over the horizon. After having boarded the bus at 11:30 pm the night before and arriving in Capas, Tarlac at the ungodly hour of 3:00 am, the jeep dropped us off at the jump off point. Though our weary bodies craved sleep, we had no choice but to unload our bags as the jeep could go no further due to the softness of the sand. Though the wind was chilly, we started walking as the bright lights of a group of 4x4 vehicles zoomed past us. They whipped out their cameras and took pictures of us—an odd group of mountaineers walking steadily with heavy backpacks—as if they were in an African Safari and we were a herd of wild animals who happened to pass by.

The road of sand and rocks stretched mercilessly before us. All around us were astounding fomations of hard ash and lush vegetation that have grown over the years since the volcano last erupted. It's been said that the mountain's terrain changes every few years as sun, wind, and rain continually beat down on its already weathered surface.

Along the way, we passed by aetas living in the nearby areas. Some children asked for bread, while others merely smiled and gazed curiously as we walked past.

The trek was a relaxed and relatively easy one. Unlike in our previous training climbs, we were able to stop and rest at our leisure. We took time to admire the scenery, pose for pictures, and breathe in our surroundings. Numerous streams, both big and small, snaked their way across our path and provided a cool respite against the sun's burning rays.

The final stretch to the summit was tough. The heat had slowly siphoned our last remaining reserves of energy, yet our destination still seemed so far away.

But taking the final step was worth it as we beheld a view that literally took our breath away.

After having Mardel's infamous Patatim and Niel's mixed vegetables for lunch, most of us took a brief siesta to make up for the previous night's lack of sleep. When it was cool enough, we trekked down to the crater lake and took a dip in its chilly waters, not quite believing that below the surface was a deep chasm where burning ash and lava once churned and boiled till it was ready to explode.

We prepared our dinner, ate, drank, laughed, and talked endlessly as the sun finally succumbed to the night and allowed a blanket of stars to shine above us.

After a delicious breakfast the next morning, the group took some final shots and bid Pinatubo goodbye.

AMCI B2K5 in Pinatubo

Bajay, Loree, Maida, me, Roland, and Angie strike a final pose.

special thanks to Mardel and Roland for the beautiful pictures

Kute Kids

2006-02-12T12:12:00.000+08:00

Don't get me wrong. I am in no hurry AT ALL to have kids of my own (I'll get a dog first!). That's why I like "borrowing" other people's kids—I can return them when they start acting up. Hahaha! Seriously though, I love kids 'cause they always make me smile and they keep me young at heart (Isip bata? Hehe!). When they're this cute, how can you resist them?

Meet Chesca, my very cute inaanak! I think she'll be very popular with the boys when she grows up. (Mana sa Ninang eh! Hahaha!)

Say hello to Nick—my Auntie Vanessa's adorable baby boy! He is the sweetest and most well-behaved baby. He goes with anyone who wants to carry him (in other words, madaling ma-kidnap! Hehehe!).

Wheel of Fortune

2006-01-31T09:47:00.000+08:00

I got these posts from two separate e-mails that were sent to me. I'm not a hardcore believer of horoscopes and the like, but it's pretty interesting to read what my fortune will be, especially since I was born on the year of the dog. It will also be cool to read this a year from now just to see how much of it came true! I highlighted the sections that apply to me, but I posted the whole thing so you can read your fortune too. Enjoy!

The year of the Dog begins on the new moon of January 29th, 2006. (Chinese new year begins on the second new moon after winter solstice.) Dog year is a time of fairness and equality. Controversial issues are given their due, revolutions are successful, politics are liberal, and social oppression is opposed. Integrity and honesty are the values that lead to success under Dog's watchful and just influence.

People born in Dog years (1910, 1922, 1934, 1946, 1958, 1970, 1982, 1994, 2006) possess the admirable qualities of loyalty and integrity. They empathize with the underdog, and champion fairness and rights for all. Honest and trustworthy, Dog people make excellent friends and will always take your side. They have an innate sense of fair play and honor their commitments. Dogs won't hesitate to make sacrifices for the people they love and the causes they believe in. Only a Dog will loyally stand by when others have abandoned a cause. Dogs prefer to live an impeccable life, filled with principles and dignity, always willing to be a crusader for noble ideology.

Direct and frank, a person born in Dog year does not pay much attention to superficial details and has little patience for frivolity. Yet they like to be spontaneous. They prefer to react to rather than plan for a situation. They are extremely loyal in partnership and do not lightly consider having an affair. Because of this dedication, Dogs can be quite selective in the beginning stages of courtship. But when Dogs fall in love, they fall hard! They are hot-blooded and emotional, and feel all things very deeply.

One challenging trait for Dog people is that they can, at times, be judgmental or extreme, acting as if color blind and only seeing issues as either black or white. Others are either friend or foe, good or bad, right or wrong. But Dog people's quick intelligence help them to jump to the right conclusion. By applying their keen senses, Dogs can avoid problems. Dog correlates to the Western sign Libra.

YOUR FORTUNE IN DOG YEAR

Rat: Spontaneous Dog and planner Rat are very different, so anticipate some minor conflicts this year. Rat's individuality may be curtailed because it is best to comply with the wishes of the majority. Don't overthink or fret about small issues, and avoid a pessimistic or critical attitude in relationships. The spotlight will be on you in Rat year 2008 when you will start a new life cycle.

Ox: Stay strong and steady this year. Problems with others can be resolved through honest communication and attention to duty, and Ox is known for attention to duty. At times life may seem that as soon as one issue is resolved, another problem arises. But no challenge is so overwhelming that powerful Ox cannot handle it properly.

Tiger: Strong Dog and brave Tiger are best friends (along with Horse) so expect a superb year. Tiger experiences much fun, social success, and a great year for marriage and having a child. Work is also successful with good investments and fortunate enterprise. Tiger might even find devotion to a cause under Dog's idealistic influence.

Hare: Expect a pleasant and lively year because Dog is Hare's friend and defender. Recovery from the previous Phoenix (Rooster) year difficulties is foreseen, but career still requires attention. Sensitive Hare benefits by being diplomatic, which is Hare's strongest trait. A favorable year for romance and marriage, as is next year 2007 Boar year.

Dragon: Mighty Dragon could experience an uncomfortable year because Dog is opposite Dragon. So time to lay low, or as low as Dragon can. Plans could be delayed, there could be challenges manifesting your dreams, and people seem contrary. Dragon benefits by cultivating the Dog qualities of practicality and realism, which are not Dragon traits. Not a favorable year for marriage.

Serpent: Dog and Serpent are on different wavelengths, so anticipate problems concerning values, viewpoints, and ideologies. But if wise Serpents keep their opinions and insights private, and not draw attention to these problems, much can be accomplished. Dog year can be a time for new endeavors as possibilities for advancement materialize.

Horse: Expect an exemplary year because Dog and Horse are great friends. Horses can succeed in business and academics and accomplish goals. Important and influential people offer guidance and opportunities for advancement. A great year for marriage, children, travel, or a new home. Luck is with you.

Sheep: Issues could arise from neglect and lack of support from family and friends so be stronger and more independent this year. And don't become overly involved with the problems of others. Leave the rescuing to the Dogs and avoid co-dependence. Sheep does best to remain neutral and avoid rushing in to help those who will not appreciate Sheep's sacrifice. Consider taking care of yourself instead.

Monkey: No-nonsense Dog sets the tone for this year, so not a time for risks, new endeavors, or wild Monkey schemes. Don't let Dog's pessimistic attitude darken your usually sunny disposition. If your energy is diminished, care must be taken with health. Financial difficulties can result if Monkeys overextend, so play it safe and a bit more conservative than usual.

Phoenix (Rooster): Good fortune continues from the previous Phoenix year with opportunities for a new home, career advancement, and travel. Socializing, good times, and enjoyment prevail. Financial difficulties can be circumvented because Dog's influence offers Phoenix the qualities of honesty and integrity.

Dog: Dogs benefit greatly from the influence of their own year. Endeavors are successful, career achievements are attained. and the political climate is perfect for Dog's altruistic sensibilities. Outstanding time for marriage, children, falling in love, and travel. Political involvement brings rewards.

Boar: Expect a comfortable year of stability and security. Affairs are in order, although not many new opportunities for advancement are foreseen. So enjoy life and relax. Moderation is key. Next year 2007 will be the Boar year when you will begin a new fortunate twelve-year life cycle.

YOUR STAR SIGN

ARIES: New Year 2006 is a great year for love and romance. From January to March, someone who completely demands your respect will attract a good portion of your attention. Suddenly, you'll be willing to suspend all rules, clean up your act and go out of your way to prove how honorable your intentions are—just to ensure that you end up with the pleasure of their long-term company.

You may need to make a major decision regarding your job in the year 2006, due to two eclipses, classic harbingers of change. The first eclipse during mid-March, will show you on the road and may make you restless to start looking for other options. By the time the second eclipse comes in late September, you'll be completely ready to pack out your desk. Make sure of your next step before you burn any contacts.

2006 may just hold the ultimate love story for you! A fast and wonderful love affair takes up most of your time this year. Old flames may make it hard for you to break free and escape with your new love. Family and friends won't be any more understanding either. It's the chance of a lifetime to find ultimate happiness with your prince charming. Follow your heart not directions from others!

Major decisions will come easily to you by December, and you won't have to worry about any repercussions either. By New Year 2007, the changes will completely surprise you. Regardless of where you end up—or with whom—rest assured that this will be a year to remember and that everything will be just fine in the end.

LIBRA: Librarians are born peacemakers. You're always the mediator no matter who is fighting or what they're fighting over. But be cautious in New Year 2006 because you are standing up for yourself, putting yourself first, and giving more consideration to your own issues than helping everyone else with theirs.

Libra is the sign of the general; more generals are born under this sign than any others! During 2006 if you plan to work with partners and other significant people, you will definitely benefit financially. Some Librans may also find their prince charming or princesses sitting on big goldmines. Your focus will be completely on getting all your finances together and adding new feathers to your hat! Stick to it and it will happen!

In New Year 2006, even when you're behind the scenes, you're still the one calling the shots. Your guy or your best friend may be the one in the spotlight, but you're the one backstage working the lights.

Your friends, will be honest with you in 2006. Not that you won't make new friends or that your family won't be honest with you, but when your friends tell you something important (and sometimes hard), pay attention. Financially New Year 2006 is not a fruitful year. But the positive part is you are great in organizing things and you'll perfectly balance your finances also.

TAURUS: During the early part of the New Year 2006 from January through March—you will travel a lot. Adventure is on your cards, with your partner on your side. And if you're single, you are going to meet someone on this travel road.

Career matters will take an upswing during the first part of the New Year, due to a positive influence, and advice of a female figure or an elder. Trust the loving, experienced people all around you. They won't lead you off track.

Your desires have the perfect New Year for achievement and realization. This is the year when the stubbornness in your nature will be rewarded. You may purchase a new home, start your own business or get the perfect job. Follow your dreams with determination and by June you will see how far you have come!

The last months of the New Year will arrive with some big changes for you, most likely involving the improvement of joint finances and new developments in your intimate partnerships. You will start to feel quite positive from New Year's Eve, and this happy spirit is here to stay for a long time ahead.

SCORPIO: Scorpions won't easily forget 2005, for a host of mostly positive reasons, and 2006 will be much the same. In fact, right from the start—thanks to a burst of energy straight from Jupiter—you'll be active, busy and amazingly passionate. The best part is that just about everyone will be not only open to your ideas, but also eager and anxious to know what's on your mind and in your heart. In New Year 2006 your choices romantically are numerous. People will not be able to resist your charms or the Scorpio magnetism! Play the field and don't jump into commitment so fast. Have complete knowldege about your future romantic partners before committing. If you are not cautious you can get stung later on.

The first two months, you are at your charming best. You'll be able to talk anyone into anything—even though you've already tried and failed in the past. Basically, you'll be logically lethal until the middle of March; even then, the odder the situation, the easier it will be for you to present it to anyone and everyone as perfectly normal. You will be able to manage your finances with quite ease for most of 2006 and your superiors will just love you and your work.

During September and October, be carful with your personal relationships. A simple and casual flirtation can develop into something far more serious during this time. If you're already attached to someone joyfully, express your feelings with much more intensity. Your partner will be simply delighted to see you open up and share your inner most and deepest feelings and thoughts and share their own, as well.

GEMINI: Balancing your career and domestic life are the two most important things on yur mind this New Year. The eclipses of New Year 2006 highlight your sectors of public standing, career, home, and family, suggesting that it's time for a bit of a shake-up in these areas.

New Year 2006 for most Gemini's is a year where you will be more outspoken and listened to. you will receive all the attention of the world. You will take accurate decisions, taking 2006 in your stride completely.

Uranus is square your Sun (or Ascendant) the first three months of the year. There will be alterations in your lifestyle that can be quite significant, and new directions in terms of your goals. A strong need for independence marks this period of the year. Life takes a roll in 2006 allowing you to take risks, make certain changes, and walk on paths that you haven't even thought of before. You are spirited and spunky this New Year 2006.

By the starting of May, your focus will completely be on your home and family and also on your career as the South Node moves along your family zone, indicating your contention to be at home. With the North Node taking the top postion in your solar chart, it is the best time to move forward and take a leap in your career and public front.

By November, Jupiter moves by your work zone, health, and your daily routines. It is a good time to start on a new job or project. Also the nature and breadth of your everyday activities and routines expand under this influence. Things are looking up for you and the job front improves majorly. With Uranus and Jupiter giving a boost, this New Year will see major improvements in your working conditions and other significant advancements.

By December 2006, Jupiter highlights partnership, offering you the chance to find joy in a special somebody, whether that's an existing sweetheart or a new one. Your loneliness will end and by 2007 you will have somebody walking along with you. By the second half of November, Jupiter crosses your Descendant giving you an opportunity to attract a partner.

SAGITTARIUS: Sagittarians are singing all together a new song. You'll amaze even yourself with the changes you'll make in the New Year 2006! While all the other zodiac signs work hard and toil away this New Year, you take it easy altogether. A decision to follow your dreams may take you to distant lands, foreign countries, even back to school where you'll quench your eternal thirst for learning!

You'll be able to manage your finances with complete ease and self control on this New Year. When during January, February and March many events will be highlighted, you will be able to find their silent indication towards a particular direction and improve your life thereon. You'll safeguard your personal integrity even more rapidly through your world-famous, up-front honesty.

For Sagittarians 2006 means tying the knot. So if you are already committed to someone then marriage is surely on your cards. Or you can meet someone special that will develop into a serious relationship this year.

CANCER: Highlights of the New Year 2006 for you include a supportive trine from electric Uranus, Jupiter moving through your sector of romance and pleasure, and activation of your communication sectors by the Nodes and the year's eclipses. 2006 balances all work events perfectly for you. A brighter and prosperous welcomes you in 2006. A new love interest may develop which in time will change into a long-term relationship. The challenge is that you will be haunted by a past love interest. Learning to let go and begin again is not a Cancer strong point! Letting go of a past relationship that hadn't worked out will be hard.

Changes are on the cards as you will begin handling everyday matters differently. Stimulating changes to your routine stem from a desire for a bit more freedom in your life—a shift in your thinking patterns that has the effect of broadening your life experiences. You now enjoy increased popularity and make new acquaintance. This New Year 2006, you can safely expect the unexpected and feel quite peaceful doing so, simply because opportunities that seem to come "out of the blue" are fortunate ones.

In 2006, you project yourself more confidently, happily and positively. You are at your most attractive in the second half of July, when Venus aligns with your Sun (or Ascendant), and especially near the end of October and into the first few days of November, when Venus trines your Sun (Ascendant) and moves through your sector of romance and pleasure. The months of October and November are very important and meaningful for you. As Venus and Mars align together, your romantic life takes a quick turn on the positive side. And if you are single and unattached, you are bound to strike up a connection.

You should be cautious between December 24, 2005 to February 3, 2006 specially in matters related to close partnerships and major purchases. April and May can be especially active months for you, as Mars aligns with your Sun (or Ascendant) and the eclipse at the end of March energizes you. This year the focus is on public and professional matters. The need to buckle down on a financial level is in order in this New Year 2006, but this is likely to come easily to you and provides you with a satisfied feeling of being in control of your finances.

CAPRICORN: When a door closes, a window opens in its place. Look carefully. You come in the limelight as influential people see your potential helping you in fulfilling your ideas and goals this New Year. Sort out your credit card bills and avoid all vague schemes presented to you. In fact, keep a tab on all your financial matters. You should be extra cautious this New Year!

New Year 2006 is a spectacular year for you. Everyone will be proud of you. And though you are a little shy of the spotlight, you'd better get used to it, as you are a star this year and will be on the hot seat for the whole of 2006.

You began working hard to achieve your professional goals (especially that reputation for fairness and benevolence) around late summer 2005. You will be surrounded by praises by your co-workers and seniors for your hard work and significant efforts put by you. But 2005 was really just practice—2006 is your year to shine.

In other news, you'll also have plenty of romantic opportunities to pursue this year. All in all, life will be good, thanks to your number one squeeze—and you've certainly earned it. Put back your head and relax. Take pride in the labor put by you and start a fantastic New Year with your loved ones. And as you begin this wonderful year, go out there and spread your blessings all around.

LEO: You're out for a real, honest-to-goodness emotional connection this New Year 2006. That's first and foremost on your priority list. Fortunately, when it comes to prospective partners, you know what you like and, more importantly, what you don't like -- and during 2006, your perceptive abilities will be especially keen. As the New Year progresses, your relationship will deepen bringing you two very close. Your attachment with your partner will increase and love will blossom around you. You may even get married by the end of the year.

Career matters will come in the forefront this year 2006. You'll be working hard and you'll definitely see some serious rewards. There would be higher-ups in charge of your paycheck and your professional future followed by the raise, promotion or bonus you've been aiming for. By the end of the year you may as well become a significant authority figure.

2006 brings forward many new challengs pushing you to new heights. There will be times when you must get up and go to work when you really don't want to and that will probably be the day you get a promotion. Making yourself do things when you'd rather not will be rewarded this year.

AQUARIUS: New Year 2006 begins on a serious note for you. Financial extravagance will be an issue this New Year 2006. In 2005 you have been quite disciplined in money matters and that will come handy this New Year.

There will be unexpected expenses too, like car repairs, home repairs or dear friends with urgent financial problems. Don't be taken back if you receive a surprise call, email or visit announcing that some loved one needs help. Make sure that you are actually helping them, and not taking them down some dangerous or negative path.

New Year 2006 brings the best out in you. As you attract new relationships and interesting friendships that reflect your newfound interests, you have little time or patience for anyone who wants to dominate your time and who is an egomaniac. Your friendships and relationships will bloom this New Year 2006 and take you to new heights.

VIRGO: This year offers you an opportunity to meet your better half or someone very special. Eclipses across your first and seventh solar houses suggest a strong focus on close personal relationships. Seeking out a partnership or perfecting the one you are in is on the agenda in New Year 2006.

2006 finds you falling madly in love with someone very unique and different than the type of person you usually go for. It is and will be a dynamic relationship, unavoidable and fascinating. It will shake you out of old grooves and predictable behavior patterns and frankly make you chirpy and happy!

The time between December 24, 2005 to February 3, 2006 is a time when you should be cautious about making purchases, taking financial risks and take your love life slowly. The time between October 28-November 18th is when communication problems can crop up, so it's advisable to keep all your paperwork in order and all important documents ready.

You are especially mentally alert and busy this New Year 2006, and opportunities to travel or simply move about can present themselves. This year you widen your social circle, update your skills, improve your communication skills, advertise, publish, and write more this year.

New Year 2006 should prove to be an exciting, busy, and fruitful year. Your life seems to speed up in 2006, and as it does, you find that you lose some of your skepticism, cautiousness, and fear of taking risks. This New Year you are finding all new ways to express yourself, making all awe in admiration.

PISCES: Things are very bright in the year 2006. One of the things that matters most to Pisceans is keeping your promises. In 2006 your commitment will be most important. A friend will come to rely on you for something very important.

At the same time—and straight through mid-March—you'll also find that several high-ranking, influential coworkers and authority figures will be looking to you to follow through on your word. They may even need a bit more of a commitment from you. Sit tight, do everything exactly as you know you should and prepare to experience a wonderful feeling: well-earned, justified pride in yourself.

Your luck shine brightly on you in New Year 2006. As Jupiter shines down on your sign, you slip out of the most difficult and sticky of situations. Be careful while making new friends. Look out for any negative vibes that develop. The friends and companions you make in 2006 will stay with you for a long time to come.

Traveling is on your cards this 2006. You'll get opportunities for long-distance traveling and if you can work out to make any of them a successful reality don't pass it up.

By the end of the year, your relationship with someone special will go up to new heights. And around the New Year you'll realize that you've got everything you could possibly wish for!

Happy Chinese New Year!

2006-01-29T12:52:00.000+08:00

Oh my God!!! I can't believe January is almost over! It seems as if the New Year has just begun, and yet a whole month has passed already! Anyway, I meant to post this earlier, but it's okay. Abot pa naman ako sa Chinese New Year. Hehehe. (My dad says the right term is Lunar New Year because they follow the lunar calendar, and it's not just the Chinese who follow it but the Muslims as well.) So, before the past year truly ends, I want to share some of the things I'm thankful for in 2005.

The Gift of Friendship. Last year, I really nurtured my relationships with people. I had countless lunches, dinners, coffee dates, and bonding sessions with my friends, both old and new. They helped me to let go and move on at the beginning of the year and have continued to fill my life with meaning throughout the year.

The Goddesses at UCC, The Fort with balikbayans George, Camille, and Jac. Jan. 2, 2006.

My Job. Being Editorial Assistant of Candy is such a great first job! I love what I do and I love the people I work with.

At the Summit Christmas party with Mia C., Ines, Mimi, and Mia F. December 14, 2005.

Reconnecting with my ASEAN friends. The SIF-ASEAN Alumni Conference in Singapore and the fellows’ visits to the Philippines allowed me to bond with them again. This proves that neither time, distance, nor culture are barriers to true friendship!

Having some sinfully good dessert at Cafe Xocolat, Eastwood with Thai friends, Gift and Neuy. December 12, 2005.

Completing the Basic Mountaineering Course and becoming a member of AMCI. It was one of the toughest things I’ve ever had to do in my life but I defied all odds! Physically, emotionally, mentally, socially, spiritually—it has helped me to grow in all aspects of my life.

With the Happy Group at the summit of Mt. Apo. October 30, 2005.

Traveling around the country. Being able to visit more new places in the Philippines (Bicol, Palawan, Davao, Sagada, etc.) made me love and appreciate its beauty even more.

Rice Terraces near Sagada. November 27, 2005.

Ate Tinnah, my unitmates, and ACLC/CLC-P. It’s such a blessing to have people to “come home to” every week—people who understand and accept me for who I am, who listen patiently as I share my experiences, who help me put things in perspective, and who help me deepen my relationship with God.

New Year's lunch at Heaven and Eggs, Eastwood with Unit Merrily. December 31, 2005.

My Family. They have never failed to love and support me, even if I don’t get to spend as much time with them because of work and all my activities. I love them so much!!!

Family picture during the annual Mejia Christmas party. Don't you just love the hats? December 25, 2005.

Incidentally, I took this quiz at tickle.com and true to Chinese New Year form, I found out that my true color is RED (which happens to be my favorite color too!). I don't think it's 100% accurate (I'm not super impulsive and I do think most of the time! In fact sometimes, I think too much! Hehehe!) but I believe it does describe a part of me. If you want to take the test too, click here!

"Your color is red, the color of racy sportscars, blushing cheeks, and luscious roses. Red symbolizes passion, romance, and love. So, since you're ruled by red, you probably trust your feelings more than your brain and tend to act spontaneously. If you see something you want, you go for it without thinking twice — impulsive is your middle name. You don't wait around for people to make decisions, either; you dive right in. Quite the romantic, you pay close attention to your emotions. In fact, if your heart isn't in what you're doing, you won't be satisfied. Of course, even when you do pour all your energy into the projects you tackle, your impetuous nature means your passions can shift as frequently as the wind. That's why some reds have trouble with commitment. Our advice? Next time you're feeling fickle, think before you act, if possible. You might be surprised at the results. Overall, though, it's great to be red. No one lives life more completely than you do."

A Happy Lunar New Year to one and all!!!

Happy Birthday to Me! (Part II)

2005-12-30T22:18:00.000+08:00

While trying to re-organize my messy room today, I chanced upon a small book entitled The Birth Date Book that somebody gave me for my birthday. It reveals a lot about a person based on his or her date of birth. As I was reading it, I found myself relating to it a lot. Here are some of the things the book says about people born on December 21 (i.e. ME!!!).

(Text taken from The Birth Date Book: December 21 by Joan Schweightghardt. Andrews McMeel Publishing, Kansas City, 1998. Italicized comments are mine.)

Your Astrological Sun Sign: Sagittarius
The powerful archer pulls back the taut string of his bow, sending his arrow speeding toward a specific target. Persons born under the fiery sign of Sagittarius often share this powerful directness. You have the strong will, the optimism, and the vitality to set a goal and go for it with gusto. You must achieve great things... and if it takes a little chutzpah to get there, you can usually supply that too!

As a Sagittarian, you can entertain a roomful of people with your stories, but your whimsical, restless nature rarely allows you to stay put for long… You need new terrains to conquer, and you have the intellect, the zeal, and, often, the luck to do it. (So true!)

Alphabet Soup: E, I, and P
December 21s often find that names and places beginning with the following letters become especially significant during the course of their lives: E, I, and P. For a happy wanderer like you, energy, impulsiveness, and pride will take you to exotic places: Incan ruins in Peru, rattletrap train rides through India, or Celtic stone carvings in the heart of England!

Your Magical Food: Oranges
What is the essence of an orange? Sunlight! And that’s the essence of most December 21s too. An hour spent with you can dissipate any lingering clouds of depression. Your effervescence and zest for life are as contagious as laughter. Oranges are full of Vitamin C; you are full of good cheer. Both are equally essential to good health. Perhaps this is why you are always surrounded by friends.

Flower Power: Columbine
Graceful as the columbine, tender and tenderhearted, December 21s can nearly always soothe an aching head or comfort a breaking heart. Empathetic by nature, you know by instinct when to offer assistance and, equally important, when to back off. But let’s not get too serious! You can be a healer, yes, but first things first: Where’s the party? (Haha! This sounds so like me!)

Your Secret Wish
While a desire for health and happiness for yourself and your loved ones is at the core of your being, you also yearn for flight. Some December 21s satisfy this wish by hang-gliding—or by boarding jets for exotic destinations (Does mountain climbing count?). Others prefer little excursions of the imagination in which they can envision themselves elsewhere—from Singapore to Alaska to the local beach resort!

Personality Profile
December 21s can be some of the most charming personalities in the cosmos (Thank you, thank you!) Typically, you live by the philosophy that if nothing is wrong, then everything must be right! And although you’ve had enough experience to know that things may go wrong sooner or later, you are generally willing to try to make the best of even the worst situations… Your optimism in the face of adversity gives you the gleam that makes you so attractive to others, especially those whose own inner light might be a little dimmer. (Aww, that’s why I’m the Goddess of Light!)

December 21s are generally not very good at hiding their feelings. Although you may have learned to keep your lips zipped, your facial expressions and even the smallest gestures will sometimes let the cat out of the bag. While this natural expressiveness will not get you very far at the poker table, it makes you all the more captivating in the eyes of others. (Haha! I sure hope so! More than one person has told me that when I like someone, it’s so obvious! :p)

In other words, people tend to look up to December 21s—which can sometimes feel like an awesome responsibility. But face it: You are one of the few people who truly believes that for every problem there is at least one solution—sometimes two!—even though you may not always care enough about a particular problem to probe that far. As a matter of fact, you can often be downright stubborn when you are confronted with something you absolutely don’t want to do. And getting December 21s to change their minds can be the equivalent of moving a brick wall! (Guilty as charged!)

At Play
December 21s are often too restless to participate in the kinds of activities that draw less energetic types. A couch potato you’re not—if you do let down your guard and opt for the easy chair, you probably spend half your time sitting there thinking about what you could be doing instead. (But I so love DVD marathons!)

Your busy mind strives, successfully, to be in two places at once. You can be charging full speed ahead on the treadmill at the gym and still be completely aware of the conversation going on in the corner by the water cooler. And if the conversation gets interesting, December 21s may even decide to abandon their exercising and join in on the fun! (Especially if it involves food!)

How Do You Love?
While your time is much too valuable to be spent fostering lifelong relationships with everyone you meet, when you do fall in love, your greatest desire is for lasting, honest intimacy. And December 21s hope that their mates feel the same way.

In other words, what December 21s want in a partnership is nothing less than a soul mate—and soul mates, as you probably learned early on, are not that easy to come by. Anything less will only agitate your restless nature. “Don’t look back” could be your motto; there are plenty of fish in the sea, and one of them is bound to be a keeper! (Right on!)

Courtship is the true test of any relationship. December 21s don’t necessarily require vacations to a villa on the Italian seacoast or front-row seats at the next Rolling Stones concert, but you are very alert to the little things that mean so much. (If only the guys who liked me knew this! Hehehe!)

December 21s seek out people who are: imaginative, adventurous, self-confident, freedom-loving, ebullient, and idealistic.

December 21s avoid people who are: possessive, moody, jealous, brooding, restrictive, or intolerant.

Flashback: Your Past Lives
In any past life, December 21s would have been in close connection to fire or its symbolic equivalent, creativity. It is not unlikely that your past lives included the following occupations: Poet, fire chief, fortune-teller, candle maker, speech writer, or chili picker.

So, what do you think? Let me know!

All I Want for Christmas

2005-12-24T17:56:00.000+08:00

Angel and Bow Wow

Happy Birthday to Me! (Part I)

2005-12-21T00:00:00.000+08:00

Another year has come and gone. Indeed, each year has brought its own share of new experiences and wild adventures, joy and sorrow, laughter and tears. And throughout all these, I have been blessed with great friends and family who have always been there for me. But before I get all sentimental, here is a list of my most memorable birthdays:

December 21, 1994 (12 years old). My parents gave me a thick hard bound journal where I wrote my first diary entry. I have been writing consistently in my journal since then and I am now up to 11 volumes!

December 21, 1996 (14 years old). My crush, M, greeted me a happy birthday. It was the first time he spoke more than a few words to me. He eventually became my friend and has greeted me every year since then. :-)

December 21, 1998 (16 years old). Dinner and dancing with Ate Cha and my high school friends at Hard Rock Cafe. I was made to stand on a chair and had whipped cream splattered on my face!

December 21, 2000 (18 years old). I've always dreamt of being serenaded. I got my wish on my 18th birthday party when my good friend, Nicky, sang "She" by Elvis Castello (She may be the face I can't forget... A trace of pleasure or regret... May be my treasure or the price I have to pay...) It was his first time to sing in front of a crowd but his voice could rival that of Josh Groban. Now, he sings, plays the piano, arranges, and composes music for our church choir, Hangad, and the Ateneo Chamber Singers.

December 21, 2002 (20 years old). I attended Simbang Gabi that morning and when I stepped out of the church at the end of the mass, my unitmates were there to surprise me! I was so touched because we had gone caroling the night before and ended at almost 1 am already. Plim even woke up extra early to fetch Crystal in Makati and Ann in Pasig. Some of them don't get to attend prayer session regularly and yet they were there during my birthday. Some had other engagements to attend to, but still they were there despite having only a few hours of sleep!

December 21, 2004 (22 years old). I spent my birthday going around the cool and romantic province of Dalat, Vietnam with SIF-ASEAN fellows Neuy, Tat, Plim, Richard, Nats, and Cuong. It was the annual flower festival and the place was bursting with lights and colorful flowers.

December 21, 2005 (23 years old). I had a simple celebration at home with my ACLC friends whom I haven't been able to spend a lot of time with while I was busy working for Candy and climbing mountains. These are the people I spent four years in college praying, going to Payatas, studying, and partying with. The current members of the org graced us with their angelic voices and heavenly carols—something which I really miss doing!

Time to sing!

Me and Gameng, my birthday-mate.

My Angel-Soul Family.

With two of my favorite people, Tris and Macyl.

Group shot!

Me and the boys of Unit Merrily: Lao, Plim, Galv, and Kekek.

Dare to Explore

2005-12-14T17:20:00.000+08:00

Last Friday, December 9, AMCI had its Christmas party-slash-graduation party for the newly inducted B2K5 members. Having received the certificate of completion for the Basic Mountaineering Course, or even upon receiving my shiny silver dog tag at the peak of Mt. Apo, I felt no overwhelming sense of elation or excitement. Instead, there was a quiet sense of pride for having accomplished a course that many individuals would not even dare to try.

Indeed, the past five months have been a test of faith, courage, and skill. Many of my friends and relatives wonder why I decided to take up the sport of mountaineering. Somewhere in between the beginning of training and the heart-wrenching trail of Sky on our second training climb, I found my answer—I climb because it makes me feel truly alive. I can say it over and over again, but somehow, one will not understand until one experiences it for himself.

However, this slideshow by my fellow batchmate, Borj, somehow captures the essence of why we climb. (Really great job, Borj!) I share it here in the hopes of inspiring you to get into mountaineering as well. After all, no climb is complete without the company of friends. In the words of this year's BMC theme, "DARE TO EXPLORE!"

If you can't view the video, click here. It might take a while to load, but I promise, it's worth it!

Chocolate Overload

2005-11-24T11:07:00.000+08:00

Here's another reason why I love my job.

Some of the Summit girls and I attended the Hershey's Happiness Photo Contest Awards Night at Crowne Plaza last Monday. The food, pica pica style, was scrumptious, but the desserts were something else. All of them were made with rich Hershey's chocolates—creamy mousse covered with thin chocolate shavings, chocolate tarts topped with a slice of strawberry, chocolate chip cookies, brownies, and more! In the end, they also gave us a big bag filled to the brim with Hershey's chocolates. Aaah, HEAVEN.

There was an on the spot photo contest during the event and the girls and I took some wacky photos of our own.

Hangin' with Mr. Hershey.
Clockwise from left: Me, Koko, Mimi, Ines, Kat, and Mia. F.

This next picture won us the grand prize—a trip for two to go anywhere in the Philippines via Cebu Pacific. Unfortunately, there are six of us so we don't know how to split the prize. Can't we have a lifetime supply of chocolates instead?

The Winning Photo: Sealed with a Kiss!

If this isn't hapiness, I don't know what is!

On Top of the World

2005-11-19T15:44:00.000+08:00

"It's not the mountain we conquer, but ourselves."
—Sir Edmund Hillary

At the peak of Mt. Apo. October 30, 2005.

To Infinity and Beyond

2005-10-15T10:18:00.000+08:00

“The body does not want you to do this. As you run,
it tells you to stop—but the mind must be strong. You
always go too far for your body. You must handle the
pain with strategy... It is not age; it is not diet.
It is the will to succeed.”
—Jacqueline Gareau, 1980 Boston Marathon champion

No words can fully describe the intense and emotional experience that was our first 15 kilometer run in UP Los Baños last October 2, 2005. I arrived at the campsite at 12 midnight, having come all the way from my cousin's wedding in Tagaytay. Though I was not able to sleep at all that night, I had to get up at 4:00 am the next day to have breakfast and do some warm-up exercises.

The 15 km run is an event we have all been training hard for. It was one of the last requirements we needed to complete to become eligible for induction—and we had to finish it in only two hours. We had to run six rounds on a 2.5 km trail that would go steadily downhill, take several sharp turns, and then go steeply uphill. I admit that in the past, I was not at all confident that I would finish it. But in the days leading to the event, I really had to psych myself up and believe that I could do it. When they “fired the gun,” I just ran and ran and ran. I could feel the adrenaline pumping through my veins, and thankfully, I was able to finish it in one hour and 55 minutes!

Of course, I was ecstatic that I had completed what had heretofore seemed an impossible feat. But moments after I had crossed the finish line, I couldn’t help but remember a line from the reading Ate Tinnah gave us during our last prayer session: “In the long run, there can be no real joy for anybody until there is joy finally for us all.” Though many of us successfully crossed the finish line, others did so in sheer pain. Yvonne, who was the last person to cross the finish line within seconds of the time limit, was being carried by two people as she was suffering from cramps. How could we who crossed the finish line in time celebrate, when some of our co-trainees were injured and others did not reach the cut-off time? All the while I was thinking, "That so easily could have been me!"

Indeed, I was deeply humbled and amazed by the whole experience. I was so grateful to God and to the very supportive trainees and members who encouraged us, guided us, manned the water stations (very very important!), and literally pushed and ran with us to the finish line. I particularly remember George, whose presence near the finish line was so comforting, and Jon who would quietly hearten us to go on. Because they had failed to complete the training climbs, they were no longer eligible for induction at the time. And yet, they were still there to give their wholehearted support. (Jon even finished the 15 km run with the fastest time!)

* * *

Last week, we had the second 15 km run at Fort Bonifacio for those who didn’t make it the last time. I ran a little more than half of the route to support my co-trainees, and manned the water stations with Jen, Lyn, and Ava the rest of the time. By the grace of God, everybody was finally able to complete the runs in time!

After a series of pre-climb meetings for the induction climb, I passed my letter of intent to become a member of AMCI and had my panel interview. Despite the somewhat daunting presence of a lot of officers and members and the fact that I had to tell a joke and sing a song, I think it went well enough. I may not have thought this through when I first joined the training, but after all the experiences I’ve been through in the last few months, I am now firm in my resolve to become a member of the club. As I told the BMC committee in my letter of intent, I want to join AMCI “not only because I believe I will learn and grow more as a member, but also because I want to impart my newfound knowledge and love for climbing to other people who will be crazy enough to join this club next year.”

The only thing that stands between me and membership now is MT. APO.

To infinity and beyond!

The Beauty of Benguet

2005-09-25T23:19:00.000+08:00

"In those days, he departed to the mountain to pray..."

—Luke 6: 12

* * *

No words can express the sense of wonderment I felt as my eyes took in the dizzying yet awe-inspiring 360-degree views of the Kibungan Mountain Range. Though it definitely had its fair share of difficulties (for instance, it was the first climb that had me in tears by lunch time on the first day), our third training climb last September 9-11, 2005 was definitely the most enjoyable climb I've experienced thus far. With a group of wonderful people and breathtaking views, what more can you ask for? I'll let the pictures tell all!

* * *

Our first pre-climb meeting at Jollibee with GL Malvin and AGL Momoy.

Our second pre-climb meeting during the rapelling activity was just as filling.
(No wonder Malvin and Gilbert have fallen asleep!)

Who knew that grocery shopping with the group could be fun?

Departure for Baguio.

A group shot at the jump-off point.

Happily crossing one of the many bridges with Happy!

Maida and I at the peak of Mt. Ooteen on the second day.

We made it!

This is as close to heaven as we're going to get.

Trekkers wait for the starter's gun.

The Others.
Clockwise from left: Happy, Yvonne, Alexis, Mon, Nestor, me, Sharon,
Malvin, Momoy, Francis, and Gilbert.

Tell me what this looks like to you.

Setting up our tent at the second campsite.

A scrumptious dinner of deep fried spicy chicken, pasta, french bread, white wine,
and mango crepes (specially prepared by Momoy) for dessert!

Walking along the edge of the rice terraces.

The view that makes it all worthwhile.

Crossing the last bridge on the way back to civilization.

Eat-all-you can Mongolian dinner at Oh My Kahn, Baguio.

The bus ride home.

It ain't over till it's over!
Post-climb meeting at Dencio's, Metrowalk.

Rapelling at Camp Vicente Lim

2005-09-24T23:48:00.000+08:00

When they told us we'd be rapelling from atop a four-story building, I thought, "They've got to be kidding." And when they said, we'd have to do it not once, but three times and in three different positions (including head first!), I had no idea what to expect!

Tower of Doom.

Every step I took to go up that building made my heart beat faster and my mouth go drier. As the instructor fastened the carabiner firmly to the ropes, I thought, "Well, it's now or never!"

Can you sense the fear behind that smile?

"Trainee number 53, Angela Constantino, ready to perform standard rapelling, sir!"

A true celebrity always smiles for the camera.

Just a few more steps, Angel! You're almost there!

I heaved a great sigh of relief when my feet finally touched level ground. I felt really good when it was over for it was actually a lot easier than I thought—that is, until they made us rapel lizard-style!

Is there something on the wall? It must be all the blood rushing to my head!

If you can get through this, you can get through anything!

Trainees relax on the ground while waiting for their turn.

After lunch, it was time to rapel the Australian way. I wanted to throw up! Good thing I didn't though or else poor Jay, who was belaying me, would've been covered in rice, beef nilaga, lechon kawali, and ice cream! Hahaha!

Praise the Lord!

Hanging out with Wency, Gerry, Jazzie, Borj, and Janice after rapelling.

Indeed, it was a taxing day for all of us. Hysterical screams came out of some trainees, while others were reduced to tears. While some simply breezed down the building in perfect form, others who are normally poised and happy cursed out loud for fear. But in rapelling, as in life, it is usually the first step that is the hardest. The moment when you're about to step over the platform, looking down and wondering whether you're going to plummet to the ground, you feel fear and apprehension. Some throw caution to the winds and take a leap of faith. Others, like me, are a little more hesitant. But once you take that first step, there's no turning back. It becomes easier with each step, and in the end, you realize that you had nothing to fear after all. :-)

Special thanks to my co-trainees, Francis, Alman, and Eubert for the great pictures!

Misadventures at Mariveles

2005-09-22T11:26:00.000+08:00

"With you, I am always with you. You hold me tight, your hand in mine.

You bring all things to a good end. You lead me on in your good pleasure.

What is heaven to me without you?

Where am I on earth if you are not there? Though my body is broken down,

though my heart dies, you are my rock, my God, the future that waits for me.

Far away from you, life is not life. To break faith with you is to be no one.

With you, my highest good, my God, with you, I am secure."

—Psalm 73

Music and lyrics by Manoling Francisco, S.J.

An exciting and adventure-filled weekend awaited us on the eve of August 12, 2005. We were all set to scale Tarak Peak in Mariveles, Bataan. At approximately 1,155 meters above sea level, it's not quite as high as Tapulao—but with a trail blazed by none other then Mr. Rudy "Sky" Biscocho himself, both AMCI members and trainees were in for a lot of unexpected surprises.

TC 2 Super Group!
From L-R: Francis, Niel, Rendo, Sir Atoy, Neri, Mercy, me, and Tisoy

We began trekking at 5:00 am from the MC Jam Square Resort. We stopped momentarily at the DENR post where groups were then dispatched at 10-minute intervals. It had rained the night before so by the time we got to the Panikian river and waterfalls for the first river crossing, the current was very strong. Though I clung tightly to the ropes, the rushing waters threatened to buckle my knees and push me downstream. If Sir Atoy hadn't grabbed my backpack and pulled me to safety, the sweepers might have collected my lifeless body at the foot of the mountain! (Okay, maybe that's an exaggeration. After all, they found Janet's jacket draped over one of the rocks further down the mountain. It's sleeves were outstretched, as if hanging on for dear life!)

The first of many river crossings.

Taking a break while waiting for our turn to cross the river.

Waterfalls in the distance.

A path that proved challenging was Cox's wall. Yes, it was literally a wall! We had to hold on to ropes and ascend on an almost vertical terrain with very few footholds. Rocks, big and small, rolled mercilessly down the mountain!

It was definitely a relief to arrive at the Pangil Campsite where we had a brief respite from the torturous trail set before us. Though undeniably challenging, Sky was right to call it a "pure nature art trail." The rivers were filled to the brim and views of the waterfalls were breathtaking.

A photo of the Sllaj Waterfalls taken by Alman.

The rushing river.

After a few more hours of trekking, we reached the Loreejen Stream, which was the last water source. We loaded up on camp water and forged ahead.

The path that stretched ahead of us.

Yes, that's me! Thanks for taking the picture,Vince!

Like Cox's wall, the Magellan trail that came after was a steep vertical ascent. I actually found it quite exciting though! It was like wall-climbing for real—only this time, our handholds and footholds were in the form of rocks, plants, and tree roots.

The trail seemed to go on for hours. My groupmates and I were getting very tired but we hiked on. Though relieved when the Magellan trail was finally over, the huge boulders that loomed above us when we reached the Japanese gardens were hardly consoling. This trail was a little trickier because there were no more tree roots to hold on to. The rocks were huge and slippery. One wrong move could send you plunging down the misty depths of the mountain.

But alas, we made it to the summit! It was so foggy, we could barely see anything (but we were told that on a clear day, the view of Corregidor is breathtaking from here).

Rendo, Niel, and I strike a pose!

Francis stands by the sign that says Tarak Peak—the only proof that we had made it.

After taking a few hurried pictures, Niel, Francis, Rendo, and I started the trek down to the Tarak Ridge campsite. It was getting dark and we were having trouble spotting the trail signs. When we emerged from the forest after about an hour, we finally spotted the colorful sea of tents in the distance. Our camp was so near... yet so far! Going downhill was slippery and the winds were so strong, I had a hard time keeping my balance.

From Tarak peak down to the campsite.

View from the campsite. See the waterfalls in the distance?

I finally reached the campsite at around 7:00 pm. Some of my groupmates made it earlier (we were the first group to be completed at the campsite!). We were very lucky because we trekked for less than 12 hours. We were able to cook, eat a proper dinner, have our own socials, and sleep safely in our tents. Others trekked for 24 hours—in the rain and in the dark!—with only their tarps to keep them warm and their head lamps to guide them. Before the climb, I actually felt quite anxious because my GL had a reputation for prioritizing speed on the trail. But in the end, his prodding for us to keep a steady pace and meet the IT was certainly a blessing because it spared us from a potentially toxic 24-hour trek.

Time for breakfast!

Brrr... it's cold!

The trek down was a lot easier. This time, we used the traditional trail, which allowed us to relax and enjoy the scenery. As one of my groupmates said, we would have appreciated Sky's trail more had we not been fearing so much for our lives. (But in fairness, this trail was definitely more exciting than Tapulao. Not only did it allow us to experience all kinds of terrain, it also gave us one big adrenaline rush!)

Wake up, Niel, we're almost there!

The hills are alive!

The road from whence we came.

Before I end, allow me to wax philosophical and share some of my reflections.

For the duration of this course, I'm sure a lot of us have asked ourselves, "Why are we doing this?" I have already found a multitude of reasons, but perhaps the greatest is this—it has allowed me to be fully present and to feel fully alive. Only now have I been able to make full use of my senses, and exhaust my physical, mental, and emotional faculties. When you're climbing, there's no room to think about anything but the climb, and more importantly, there's no room for self-doubt. You become very aware of yourself and your surroundings. You feel fear, excitement, anxiety, and exhilaration all at the same time. Of course, I cannot speak for everyone, but I personally feel a sense of achievement after every climb, or even after every training session and activity we've had. I've conquered many fears and surpassed seemingly insurmountable limits throughout the course of this training. But the journey is far from over. My only prayer is for the Lord to continue giving me the strength to see it through.

Super group is back at the resort!

TC1 group reunited (albeit with a few extras)!

B2K5 ROCKS!!!

Real Beauty

2005-08-20T10:58:00.000+08:00

Ines and I attended the launch of Dove's Campaign for Real Beauty in the Philippines last week. There was a forum hosted by Boy Abunda, with an impressive line-up of guests like MTV VJ Nicole Fonacier, Dove spokesperson Mia Sebastian, former Ms. Universe Gloria Diaz, TV Hosts Patricia Evangelista and Drew Arellano, as well as other experts. They debated about what real beauty is, how the media has cast beauty into narrow stereotypes, and how Dove is trying to change them. To find out more about this truly inspirational campaign, log on to www.campaignforrealbeauty.ph and check out my article in the August issue of Candy! ;-)

"Can you be sexy without being busty? Join the beauty debate."

"How long will we go on believing that only fair skin is beautiful? Join the beauty debate."

"Does skin really have to be flawless to be beautiful? Join the beauty debate."
(I wish I combed my hair before they took the picture though. Heehee!)

Me and Ines with cutie Drew!

Surviving Mt. Tapulao

2005-08-01T22:10:00.000+08:00

Jesus spoke thus, "Come to me all you who work hard

and who carry heavy burdens and I will refresh you.

Take my yoke upon you and learn from me

for I am gentle and humble of heart, and you will find rest.

For my yoke is good and my burden is light."

—Mt 11: 28-30

A long and rocky road stretched ahead of us on the morning of July 16, 2005. Mt. Tapulao, a.k.a. "High Peak," is located in Iba, Zambales. At approximately 2,000 meters above sea level, it is the highest point in the Central Luzon Region.

Check out those huge backpacks!

And the road goes on...

Group 2 takes a rest stop near the first water source.

Tired mountaineers must take a break for lunch!

After more than eight hours of walking, we finally reached the campsite. It was raining and we had to pitch our tents fast. Though Aryxz, Von, and I practiced how to pitch the tent Jon lent us before the climb, it took us forever to do it. When we finally managed to pitch it (with Angie and Jay-Z's help), the tent had already gotten wet and we were freezing! After changing into dry clothes, we proceeded to set up the camp kitchen and cook our dinner.

A sea of colorful tents amidst the pristine mountain grounds.

This shot by my groupmate Jon shows the unique beauty of the mountain.

Chopping green mangoes and tomatoes with our trusty swiss knives.

A scrumptious dinner of ensalada, beef kaldereta, and spicy tuna pasta!

Dusk at Tapulao.

After dinner, we had our camp socials (where I'm sure the members had a whale of a time watching the trainees' creative presentations!). We trudged back to our tents at around 10:30—lights out for trainees—to rest our tired and aching bodies. For someone who has a hard time sleeping in new places, I was surprised to have slept soundly that night—so soundly, in fact, that Aryxz, Von, and I refused to wake up at four o' clock the next morning despite Jim and Angie's insistent wake-up calls. It was just so warm and cozy being wrapped up in our makeshift blankets and hearing the rain drumming lazily on the roof of our tent. We were supposed to climb to the summit after breakfast, but a sudden downpour of heavy rains prevented us from doing so. We hurriedly "broke camp" and started our descent.

Contrary to popular belief, going downhill was definitely not any easier than going uphill. The rocks were moss-ridden and slippery. To make things worse, it was raining so hard that our path was drowned by rushing waters. It was like walking along a river. During the times when we would walk along level paths (and I wasn't so busy looking at the ground and worrying about the next time I was going to fall), I would look up and see myself surrounded by tall grasses and pine trees, the rain splashing on my face, and the mist hovering mysteriously around me. It was like being in a scene straight from Jurassic Park. Surreal.

Seeing the lands and the river on the horizon was a sign that we were only a few hours from the foot of the mountain.

At the end of the trek, we got a chance to take a dip in the river. All our pains seemed to be washed away by the cool, strong current.

Aaaah... REFRESHING!!!

Tapulao river babes.

All in all, it was a weekend rich in learning and experience. I felt quite proud of myself for having survived my first mountain-climbing experience. I was so scared before the climb and I kept on imagining the worst things that could happen. But surprisingly, I weathered the trail without too much difficulty... No, I take that back! It was damn hard, and to be honest, I was cursing God and myself in the middle of the trail for having joined this course. But aside from a few scratches, bruises, and a dead toenail, I'm okay! And though I seriously considered quitting during the trek, I now look forward to getting to know more people—both members and trainees—and having another world of experiences in the next climb. I am seriously going to miss being with the people in my group though. They have all been so helpful and supportive. I truly would not have been able to survive this first climb without them!

Group 2 totally rocks!
Clockwise from left: Eubert, Jay-Z, Bojo, Gerry, Joseph 1, Joseph 2, Jim (not in picture), Jon, Henry, Oca, Aryxz, Angie, Yvonne, and me!

But aside from feeling proud, I was also deeply humbled by the experience. I made a lot of mistakes. I kept hurrying up because I didn't want to be "the weakest link" that I failed to wait for my other groupmates and I wasn't able to fully appreciate the beautiful things around me. I slipped and fell countless times (most of the time, in front of someone crushworthy!), but after awhile, I learned to just get up and keep going. I've realized that the only fatal fall is the fall of death (falling in love is a close second, but I'll save that for another post!). I've learned that it's okay to be slow and to go at my own pace. As the members have repeatedly reminded us, this is not a race.

Before I end, I just have to say that I really admire the sweepers. They are a group of people who stay at the end of the pack to make sure that nobody is left behind. When someone is injured (as a few of the trainees were during this climb), the sweepers take care of that person. Sometimes, they don't even make it to the summit because they have to stay with the injured person—walking with her, carrying her backpack (in addition to their own), setting up camp, giving up their own tent, and feeding her, if necessary. I think it's easier to be in the lead pack where you can breeze past everybody else (though I'm sure they also have their fair share of difficulties), but it takes a great deal of patience to stay at the back of the pack or to "sweep" an injured person. It comforts me to know that should I get into an accident, the trusty sweepers will be there for me.

The sweepers with team leader Don.

During our post-climb meeting, one of the sweepers said that if you get "swept," you shouldn't feel bad. In fact, you should feel proud of yourself because despite the difficulty, you survived (like Mommy Beng whom I really admire because she persevered despite her sprained ankle)! He also said that if anything stresses us out in the real world, we should look back on our time in the mountains and think that if we survived that, we can survive anything. Indeed, the unwavering optimism of AMCI members has never ceased to amaze me. I guess when the going gets tough, there's just no room for negative thoughts—something I will definitely keep in mind during our challenging training sessions and our next climb!

The bus ride home. Tata for now!

Moment of Truth

2005-07-14T22:08:00.000+08:00

The adventures of a mountaineer wannabe

Our first training climb is fast approaching (less than two days away!). Last night after our final pre-climb meeting, I thought, "I can't do this! What the hell was I thinking?!?!" I don't know how I'll carry my heavy back pack up the mountain for eight hours (10 if we're slow!). I'm also the only first-time climber in my group, and though my groupmates are great and I know they won't leave me behind, I don't want to be "the weakest link." I don't want to be the reason the group slows down and I don't want to start crying in the middle of the trail. My friend Ruth told me that on her first trek, she started crying when they finally reached the summit and she wished for nothing but a helicopter to whisk her away. Though her words are hardly comforting, I am reassured by the fact that she made it back in one piece, and that she said this will really increase my confidence and independence!

Thanks to friends and family who have been very supportive and encouraging, my fears have somewhat abated. But fears are good too, I think. I remember the weeks leading to my departure for Singapore last year. I was terrified! After all, it was the first time I was going to be living away from home—in another country no less! But I lived through the experience. I didn't go home unscathed, but I did go home with the best memories and I gained the best friends.

So as I scale Mt. Tapulao, at Iba, Zambales this weekend, I will begin with the end in mind. I told myself I would go through with this course and go through with it I will. As our group leader Angie told us, "Just like Harry Potter, the underdog who beats Lord Voldemort each time, you too can beat the odds in TC1 as long as you possess the courage to face them. May your feet take flight with the wings of courage. WINGARDIUM LEVIOSA!!!" (Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince comes out tomorrow. Yay!)

But of course, I still need your prayers, friends! And as my age-old mantra goes, "I AM BRAVE, I AM STRONG, KUYA JESS IS BY MY SIDE!"

10 Reasons Why Working in Candy Rocks!

2005-07-09T19:36:00.000+08:00

1. I make a difference in the lives of thousands of teens.

2. The Candy girls are beautiful—both inside and out!

The Candy Staff.
From L-R: Mimi, Mia, Mel, Ines, Cindy, Ria, and me.

3. I meet the most interesting people: models, photographers, makeup artists, fellow journalists, and—my favorite—Candy cuties!

4. Not only do I meet beautiful models, I get to act like one too!

The next Candy cover girl? ;-)

5. I rub elbows with the hottest celebs!

Queer Eye for the Straight Guy's Design Doctor Thom Filicia and
Grooming Guru Kyan Douglas at a press conference in Makati Shang.

With K-Zone ed assistant Lio and Marion Raven of M2M fame.

6. I see my work (and my name!) published in the magazine.

Check out our July ish!

7. I get to write for Candy's sister mags, Seventeen and Total Girl.

8. I get to interact with teens and I get to read letters from our readers telling us how much Candy has touched their lives.

This letter is taller than me!

How can you not be inspired by letters like these?

9. I get to share my knowledge about teens with others. (Ines and I gave a talk to Unilever's regional brand managers last week. There were people from the Philippines, Vietnam, Indonesia, Thailand... it was like the fellowship all over again!)

Candy girls with Yumiko and Crystal of Unilever after Teen Talk.

10. I still have enough time to bond with my friends and pursue my other interests, like mountaineering!

All Systems Go!

2005-07-04T10:17:00.000+08:00

The adventures of a mountaineer wannabe

I went to the Medical City last Saturday to get my BMC waiver form signed by a cardiologist. I took an ECG and a stress test, where tubes were stuck to my chest to monitor my heart rate and blood pressure while I jogged on a treadmill. Looks like my heart is absolutely healthy! The cardiologist gave me the go signal to participate in the mountaineering course, saying, "Careerin mo yan! It's a good activity to do while you're young. I would do it too if I were more physically fit."

We had a good training session yesterday at the Makati Parks and Gardens (which I easily found without getting lost by the way!). We jogged 5 km around the Fort Bonifacio area, climbed up and down several flights of stairs while carrying a 3-liter load, and did the usual stretching, push-ups, and abs exercises. (It was actually not that difficult, especially with our enthusiastic and hyper classmate DJ Crystal shouting "Go BMC 2005!" every so often.) Then we had a quiz, which I probably failed since I was absent last Sunday, and a looong lecture about strength and endurance, backpacking, gear, and equipment. It was quite interesting actually and it made me feel like I was back in school, taking notes, and having exams! Though our classroom was a small gazebo in the middle of the park and our visual aids were Manila papers taped to a tarp, the lectures were very informative and were conducted quite professionally. We also had a "practical" lecture where we learned how to pitch a tent—my group did it in under five minutes!—and operate a stove. This Wednesday, we'll run 6.2 kilometers and have our first pre-climb meeting. Can't wait! :-)

To Hell and Back Again

2005-06-30T23:36:00.000+08:00

The adventures of a mountaineer wannabe

One of the things on my to-do list is to climb a mountain. I wanted to join the Loyola Mountaineers back in college but I was way too intimidated by their tryouts, which involved running ten laps around the huge Ateneo campus. The opportunity to fulfill this dream was presented to me a few weeks ago by Alman during our Pinoy SIF Alumni gathering. Without knowing exactly what we were getting ourselves into but spurred by our common desire to find adventure, Maida and I readily agreed to join him in AMCI's Basic Mountaineering Course 2005.

Needless to say, our Physical Trainings have not been easy. We had our diagnostic test in Ultra two Sundays ago. We had to get up at six-freaking-am to do a twisted version of Taebo and run four rounds around the track under the heat of the sun! And then we did a variety of exercises like push-ups, lunges, squats, calf raises, and more. The past two Wednesdays, I drove all the way to Makati in the pouring rain and got lost both times (you live, you learn). We had to run around Makati under the rain, go up and down five flights of stairs, and do various exercises at a carpark (a carpark!). If fatigue from the training doesn't kill me before the actual climbs, pneumonia, asthma from the pollution, getting a disease from lying on the carpark floor, falling on the slippery roads, or getting hit by the speeding cars around Makati might just do the job! Last Wednesday, since Maida and I were late again, the other trainees had already started running when we arrived. By the time I was on my second run, I was literally at the back of the pack. Actually, there was no more pack to speak of. They had all finished the runs and I was left to walk back to the carpark alone (I couldn't jog anymore). I felt like crying. Sometimes—no, most of the time—I think, "What the hell did I get myself into?!?!"

You know, it's funny but this whole experience actually reminds me of the first time I joined ACLC. Everything was so new and scary. I didn't think I could fit in with all the boisterous members and my fellow applicants (in AMCI's case, we're called "trainees"). Many times, I felt like quitting, giving up, taking the easy way out. But I didn't—and my time with ACLC turned out to be the most fulfilling four years of my life. I'm not giving up on AMCI either. I will improve! (We'll see who's at the back of the pack in a few months!) I mean, this is all about breaking barriers, fulfilling my dreams, and pushing myself to the limits—just as I did when I joined ACLC or when I lived in Singapore for five months. (Of course, it's also about literally climbing a mountain and appreciating the beauty of nature and of the Philippines). It's not just about improving my physical condition either. It's also about improving my driving skills and my sense of direction (I hope I have one by the end of the course!), learning to follow my intuition, and interacting with all sorts of people (I mean, this group is just as diverse as the ASEAN fellows!). I really want to finish this—to prove that I can do it. That I, who am admittedly quite maarte (is it that obvious?), can actually LIVE through this experience! In the words of our fellowship song, "Reach for the stars! Fly high as you can, brave the wind, move the mountain, YOU CAN DO IT, YES, YOU CAN!"

Palawan Adventures: Day 4

2005-06-13T23:54:00.000+08:00

Today we went to the Underground River, which was a bumpy two-hour ride from the city. On the way there, we stopped by this place where we saw a breathtaking view of Honda Bay! When we got to the Sabang area, we had to take a boat to get to the Underground River. As I looked up at the beautiful limestone cliffs, the pristine forests, and the clear blue waters we passed on the way there, I thought, "Whoever said this country's going to the dogs is dead wrong!"

A view of Honda Bay.

Jollibee welcomes us to the Underground River!

These rock formations are amazing!

Underground River, here we come!

The Underground River was situated inside a dark cave, filled with mysterious rock formations. Along with the bats that slept soundly inside the cave, we saw fruits and vegetables, animals, the three kings, the Holy Family, and even the face of Jesus!

Posing by the cave entrance.

I love this picture!

The entrance to the Underground River.

Thousands of bats reside in this dark cave!

We had lunch in the forest area surrounded by monkeys and giant lizards!

On the way back to the city, we passed by the Vietnamese Village, had merienda at Viet Ville restaurant (the food was good though nothing beats authentic Vietnamese cuisine that the fellows and I ate when we were in Vietnam!), and bought yummy jackfruit chips!

The church in the Vietnamese Village.

We had a nice dinner at Badjao Seafront Resturant to cap off our stay in Palawan. It was with great reluctance that we all trudged back to "the real world" but we are nevertheless contented with our chance to bond as a family and experience a unique and one of a kind holiday.
It's a place I'm definitely going back to someday!

Palawan Adventures: Day 3

2005-06-13T23:38:00.000+08:00

We reluctantly left Dos Palmas today and headed back to Puerto Princesa where we stayed at Hotel Fleuris. We went to mass, walked around the city, and went shopping for snacks at the mall.

The church at Puerto Princesa.

Liza, Papa, Mama, and Sabs at Plaza Cuartel.

We were lucky because that month was the celebration of the Baragatan Festival in Palawan. After dinner that night, my mom and I walked around the provincial capitol where there were a lot of stalls selling food, bags, furniture, and a variety of the most interesting artifacts!

The Baragatan Festival.

Authentically hand-woven bags!

?!?!?!

Palawan Adventures: Day 2

2005-06-13T23:29:00.000+08:00

Today was another perfect day in paradise.

The Palawan seascape.

After a scrumptious breakfast of papaya juice, garlic rice, pork tocino, daing na bangus, and assorted fresh fruits, Mama and Sabs went snorkeling, while Liz and I went scuba-diving! We had a short orientation and then it was off to open waters! We were only underwater for about 15 minutes and there was a diving instructor with us the whole time, but it was unbelievably fun! Snorkeling seemed so boring after going down 20 feet, actually feeling the soft gelatinous corals between my fingers, and swimming with the colorful fishes! I definitely want to do that again—that is, when I have more money to take lessons for a proper license! Haha!

Guess who I am!

After that, we had a picnic lunch (Grilled chicken, barbecue, squid, and crabs. Yum!) at a nearby island. Then, we swam and relaxed for awhile before heading back to Dos Palmas. Dinner that night was at an open area (we had crepes for dessert!!!) where they had a cultural show with traditional songs and dances from the Philippines. Astig! It was definitely a far cry from the partying, clubbing, and shopping in Bora. After dinner, my sister and I just sat by the beach and chilled. It was one vacation I definitely didn't want to end!

The quaint island where we had a scrumptious lunch!

Palawan Adventures: Day 1

2005-06-13T23:13:00.000+08:00

My family and I took a trip to Palawan last May and it was absolutely amazing! We took a plane to Puerto Princesa, which is the cleanest and greenest city in the Philippines. On the first two nights, we stayed at Dos Palmas Arreceffi Island Resort, which was about 45 minutes away from Puerto Princesa by boat. At first I had some qualms about staying in Dos Palmas because it's infamous for being the location of a terrorist kidnapping attack and the death of actor Rico Yan. But all these worries melted away when I saw how stunningly beautiful the place was. We went swimming and kayaking on the first day, and I was reminded of the time when the fellows and I went kayaking in Pulau Ubin—only this time, my arms didn't hurt so much! Hehe!

We were given a warm welcome in the city!

The entrance to Dos Palmas.

The beautiful Gumamela flower is abundant in the island.

My sisters relax by the shore.

Kayaking is F-U-N!!!

Look at these huge starfish!

The place was also super peaceful at night. There was no TV or radio in our room, which made it conducive to bonding and reflection (unlike Boracay with it's bustling night life and shopping area). I thought this was perfect because before I left Manila, I told myself that I would take this time to be silent and reflect on some things that have been bothering me. But as I lay on the hammock looking up at the stars, listening to the soft lapping of waves upon the shore, and feeling the cool breeze on my skin, the things that were bothering me seemed so far away. I didn't have the energy to think about anything. I just lay there smiling and thanking God for this blessing.

Palawan at dusk.

The Fellowship Lives On

2005-06-01T23:08:00.000+08:00

Malaysians Yean Shan and Kevin, and Singaporeans Peiying, Susan, and her parents took a trip to the Philippines last May. The Pinoy fellows took turns taking them around and it was like the fellowship all over again! We all had a blast and we've got loads of pictures to prove it! (I just wish I could post all 1,700 of them here!)

Yean Shan and Kevin at the colorful Pahiyas Festival in Lucban, Quezon.

The University of Santo Tomas is the oldest university in the Philippines.

Riding a kalesa in the streets of Manila.

Relaxing by Manila Bay.

Wow.

Dinner at Kitchen Restaurant in Greenbelt.

A shot at "the assorted farm".

Fresh strawberries!

The Holigores Estate in Baguio.

An authentic Baguio dinner from Don Henrico's.

Dessert from Gonuts Donuts. Yum!

Chillin' by the fireplace.

Swimming at Sea Park Beach Resort in La Union.

Sexy ladies at the beach!

The Dawson's Creek pose.

The stars of the hot new Malaysian-Singaporean-Pinoy telenovela.

A walk in the woods.

A kiss from you will turn him into your prince charming!

A picnic by the La Mesa Dam prepared by master cook Roy.

A whole lot of shopping and pasalubong for the folks at home!

Our last dinner together at Krua Thai in SM Megamall.

(Notice that there is no food left on our plates at all!)

It was sad to say goodbye to our guests but we're sure that other fellows will be coming again soon! ;-)

A Day in the Spotlight

2005-05-12T22:19:00.000+08:00

Trooped to the MTV Philippines studio last Friday with the Candy girls to interview the new MTV VJs. We also got to promote the mag and request a video on MTV Get Spotted.

Watch out for us next week! We'll be on TV!

Hanging out in the makeup room with the Candy Council of Cool.

Don't you think I look like a high school student, too? :-)

It's nerve-wracking to be on-cam but we have to keep flashing those million-dollar smiles!

From L-R: MTV VJ Reema, Mimi, Ines, and me.

The MTV VJs strike a wacky pose!

Old Dreams and New Hopes

2005-05-05T22:39:00.000+08:00

"Destiny is not a matter of chance, it is a matter of choice.

It is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved."

- William Jennings Bryan

I was browsing through my old files today and I came across a project that my barkada and I did when we were in fourth year high school. We made a book entitled The Odyssey. It was a collection of essays and short stories about our college application experiences, our advice to fellow teenagers on choosing a course, tips for acing college entrance exams, and our visions of the future.

As I was reading our visions of the future, I was struck by this line I wrote five years ago: "I always imagined myself to be the editor of Seventeen magazine, or to go local, Candy magazine." Until today, I had completely forgotten I wrote that.

I read the entries of my other friends, too. Back then, Jaclyn saw herself as a corporate lawyer, but later decided that law wasn't for her. April was set on becoming a CPA-lawyer, but later dropped her accounting classes. Ruth wanted to take up Journalism, but graduated with a degree in AB Psychology instead. Line knew then that she wanted to be a cardiac surgeon, but after a few years in med school, it looks as if she might just change her mind. It's funny how at the time, I was so worried and confused about what I wanted to do with my life, and it amazed me how my friends seemed to know exactly what they wanted to do with theirs. But in the end, I'm one of the few who actually ended up doing exactly what I wrote there (okay, so I'm not exactly the editor of Candy, but hey, I have to start somewhere! I also wrote that I wanted to work for NASA and be the first Filipina on the moon, but maybe I'll save that for another lifetime!).

I guess even then, I knew in my heart what I wanted. It's the reason why I turned down the other jobs I was offered in the fields of marketing, advertising, and finance. I know it's cliche but things really do happen for a reason. There was a reason why Ms. Bau (who is now my boss) became my English teacher in high school, why I chose Comtech as a course, why I had my practicum at an ad agency, why I stayed in ACLC for four years, why I went to Singapore after graduation, and a multitude of other things that have somehow led me to where I am today. Well, the road still stretches ahead of me and I know there are other adventures to come. I'm sure there are many more twists and turns on this road that I cannot see at this point in time, but I have faith that God will give me courage for the journey and see me through to the end... as He always has. :-)

Starstruck 2: Caught in a Hale-Storm

2005-04-28T23:19:00.000+08:00

I am starstruck once again.

I went to EMI Records today together with Candy Lifestyle Editor, Mimi, and some of the Council of Cool girls to interview rising melodramatic Pinoy band Hale. There is nothing more to say except that Champ is so cute!

Hangin' with Hale!
From L-R: Roll (guitars), Sheldon (bass), Omnie (drums),
Mimi, Me, and Champ (guitar and vocals)

Posing with Champ, Hale's lead vocalist and guitarist.
Don't you think we look good together? ;-)

Here are the lyrics to their song, Broken Sonnet, which I hope I can someday relate to (except for the last two lines)!

Broken Sonnet
Hale

Now I concede

On the night of this fifteenth song

Of melancholy, of melancholy

Now I will admit in this fourth line

That I love you, that I love you.

I don’t care what they say

I don’t care what they do

‘Cause tonight I’ll leave my fears behind

‘Cause tonight I’ll be right at your side.

The clock on the TV says 8:39 pm

It’s the same, it’s the same

And in this next line

I’ll say it all over again

That I love you, that I love you.

I don’t care what they say

I don’t care what they do

‘Cause tonight I’ll leave my fears behind

‘Cause tonight I’ll be right at your side.

Lie down right next to me

And I will never let go

Will never let go.

But still I see the tears from your eyes

Maybe I’m just not the one for you.

Wolfin' Down a Sandwich

2005-04-27T22:32:00.000+08:00

I had my first celebrity interview this week! Yay!

Our intern Clara and I trooped over to the ABS-CBN building yesterday to interview popular Pinoy rock band Sandwich. They wrote the song entitled "Humanda Ka" for ABS-CBN Interactive's new online game called Tantra and we attended the press conference to launch the soundtrack. At first we thought we wouldn't get to talk to them personally, but after waiting around for the other press people to leave, we got the chance to interview them! And they were super nice too, especially Diego, the bassist, who took pity on us and kept saying, "Hey, are you guys okay there? Kawawa naman the Candy girls they've been waiting so long!" He's so cute! It was so annoying though 'cause when we were about to take a picture with them, Clara's camera lost its battery! Good thing there was a really nice Star Records photographer there who took our picture. When he sends it to me, I'll be sure to upload it here!

From L-R: Diego, me, Raimund, Clara and Myrene.

Here are the lyrics to Two Trick Pony, one of my favorite songs (and a song that I can somewhat relate to!) by Sandwich.

Two Trick Pony
Sandwich

I want to move on
Not realizing I was moving too slow
Tried to hang on
But there was nothing left for me to hold.

It's such a shame that you can't be with me tonight.
I'm spinning 'round in cycles
Hope you change your mind
Before the show is over
I look around, it's you I thought I'd find.

I've been on standby
Not realizing I was waiting too long
Instant replay
But there was nothing I can do about it.

Still in denial
I can't believe that you can do this to me
No lights ahead
I've been looking forward but I could not see.

I have been waiting for you all night
Under the glow of the satellite.

Health Buff Wannabe

2005-04-23T20:36:00.001+08:00

I recently signed up for a one-year membership at Gold's Gym. Given that it's literally an escalator ride away from my office and I have lots of idle time between deadlines, I have no more excuse not to keep fit! Last week, I went for my first few sessions with a personal trainer. The gym's facilities are great! (Although I do miss the hot ADMU basketball players that used to inspire me when I worked out at Moro!) I tried the machines, did some free weights, and joined a cardio dance class! It was fun, but my muscles are killing me now! (I don't think I burned that much fat though 'cause my appetite also doubled!)

I also played tennis with my sister today. Finally! I haven't played since I was in Singapore. Good thing I haven't lost my skills yet. Now that I've seriously started exercising again, my next goal is to eat healthier foods. One of the things I really miss about Singapore is that it's so easy to get fresh fruits. They are in all the food courts and hawker centers, and for cheap prices at that! Hmmm... I should probably lessen my chocolates and sweets intake too. But given what a chocolate buff I am? Yeah, right!!!

My tennis buddies and I are all single...

... and available.

See you on center court!

Beyond a World of Goodbyes

2005-04-18T21:35:00.000+08:00

A personal essay on the SIF-ASEAN Student Fellowship 2004

"Reach for the stars, fly high as you can,

Brave the wind, move the mountain,

You can do it, YES, YOU CAN!"

- From the song Reach for the Stars, sung by Tata Young

at the XIII Asian games in Bangkok

The summer of 2004 had just begun when I stepped into the Office of International Programs in my home university for my qualifying interview into the SIF-ASEAN Student Fellowship program. Dressed in my freshly ironed black slacks, red collared top and leather boots, I confidently entered the room with a bright smile and a ready heart. I took a seat in front of the panel of interviewers, which was composed of the head of the Office of International Programs, two Filipino fellowship alumni, and Mr. Gerald Yeo, Director of International Networking at the Singapore International Foundation.

After several minutes of talking about my personal strengths and abilities, sharing my passion to make a difference in the lives of my countrymen, and defending my choice of candidate for the upcoming Philippine Presidential elections, Gerald asked me a most unexpected question. He said, “Angel, I noticed you like to smile a lot. Tell me, what is it that makes you feel really sad?”

Having been caught off guard, I paused momentarily to think of an answer to this perplexing question. Finally I said, “What makes me feel really sad is saying goodbye.”

Reminiscing our days at NTU...

Indeed, we live in a world of endless goodbyes. Having just graduated from my university a few weeks before the interview, I recalled the pain of saying goodbye to the people I cherished most in my four years of college. After I found out that I was accepted to the Fellowship, I again went through a whirlwind of goodbyes as my family and friends gathered for traditional Filipino despedida parties celebrated in my honor as a way of sending me off into a new and exciting journey. Saying goodbye to my family and friends in the Philippines was not that difficult because though I was filled with trepidation at the idea of being away from home for five months, I was also filled with anticipation for the wonderful new experiences that lay ahead. Little did I know that only a few months later, another painful goodbye awaited me.

I remember the last day of the Fellowship well. Hardly anyone slept a wink the night before because we were all doing last minute packing. Our rooms were turned upside down as we contemplated on what we wanted to take home with us and what we had to leave behind. In the wee hours of the morning of 10 December 2004, we lugged our overweight suitcases down several flights of stairs and hauled them into the bus. On the ride to the airport, we were silent, perhaps because of the fatigue we all felt or the dread of seeing the Fellowship, not only for our batch but for the program itself, finally come to an end.

NTUers last complete photo. December 10, 2004.

Good thing our swollen eyes aren't obvious in this picture!

Arriving at the airport and seeing the fellows from the other universities was an intense and emotional period. It was not the first time the tears flowed. We had been crying since ASEAN Nite, during the Fellowship reflections, on the bus ride to the airport for some, and perhaps even before that for others. Seeing everybody in the airport clad in their blue and grey “baseball” shirts with their luggage strewn about and plane tickets in hand brought down the reality that this was going to be the last time we would be together as a group. Indeed, it was hard to fathom how the people we were saying goodbye to during those moments had come to mean so much to us after what seemed like a very short four and a half months.

The NTU girls just can't let go of their favorite guy...

At the end of the fellowship, it was difficult to say goodbye because for a few months, we had experienced life together. Some of us went to the same university, slept under the same roof, visited the same places, and participated in the same activities. But while we were having similar experiences, we also met different people, studied different subjects, and experienced the fellowship in our own unique ways. We grew close to one another because whether our experiences were different or the same, we immersed ourselves in each other’s stories. Not only did we share in each other’s joy and happiness, we also shared in each other’s pain and sorrow.

During endless conferences that could last from midnight to sunrise, we laughed at each other’s crazy antics, sang enthusiastically to our favorite songs, and ravaged our supply of fattening snacks. In the quiet moments, we shared our hopes and dreams, as well as our doubts and fears. When times got tough and we felt like we were hanging on to life by a thread, we cried with each other and held each other’s hands. Not only did we see each other in our worst physical state – such as the times when we just woke up without having taken a bath, combed our hair, or brushed out teeth – we also saw each others’ faults, weaknesses and limitations. But even after seeing all these, we loved and accepted each other just the same.

Together through thick and thin, the NTU girls have become my best friends.

From L-R: Neuy, Giang, Susan, Me, Bong and Wina.

In the fellowship, we depended on one another. Whenever there was a new activity that had to be organized, we were there to lend a helping hand. For instance, during the Makan Fiestas, fellows from different countries helped the host country for the night to prepare the food, set-up the place, and clean up after all the food had been heartily eaten. During the ASEAN Stories Project, we worked late on many nights and helped each other with props and costumes because we wanted to make sure that all the ASEAN fellows would be able to put up a performance that would show the best their country had to offer. In school, when somebody was stressed out about a project or an exam, other fellows would immediately help the person study or do the project even if it meant losing sleep as well. If they couldn’t help in a concrete way, they would give the person moral support by simply writing notes of encouragement or giving her a slice of her favorite cheesecake.

My kababayans have proven to be the most loyal and trustworthy companions.

The Pinoy Makan Fiesta. August 18, 2004.

From L-R: Wil, Richard, Maida, Gabby, Plim, Roy, Me, Rae, and Tope.

In the fellowship, we had disagreements, but we also forgave each other. While working on different projects, it was inevitable for different personalities to clash and for the fellows to fight for their ideas. I remember the ASEAN Beauty Pageant which caused a lot of strife among the fellows because both the contestants and the organizers felt pressured to come up with a unique performance in such a short span of time. Despite the physical and emotional stress, however, we managed to put on a great show which impressed our audience at the Raffles Institution.

The beautiful ladies of ASEAN!

Raffles Institution. August 17, 2004.

In the fellowship, we encouraged each other and we worked together to achieve common goals. During the ASEAN Student Action Project, we braved the heat of the sun and gathered all the strength we had to collect old clothes and newspapers to earn money for our new friends in Tanglin School. When a fellow was afraid to swing on a rope from one end of the pool to the other during Fellowship Camp, to walk alone across the forest of Pulau Ubin in the middle of the night, or to crawl in the dark amidst the cold knee-deep water inside the caves of Malaysia, the other fellows boosted that person’s confidence by assuring her that she could do it and that the other fellows would be right behind her. For ASEAN Nite, we practiced day and night to come up with the best possible performances and to remain true to our promise to reach for the stars and together achieve a brighter future for ASEAN.

"FAN-TASTIC!!!"

Fellowship Camp at NACLI. Spetember 25, 2005.

Without a doubt, we were blessed to have experienced the true sense of fellowship for four and a half months. But as Gerald always told us, “All good things must come to an end.” Such is the cycle of life. Seasons change, the tides rise and fall, and day turns into night. Renowned author, Paulo Coelho says, “One always has to know when a stage comes to an end. If we insist on staying longer than the necessary time, we lose the happiness and the meaning of the other stages we have to go through. Closing cycles, shutting doors, ending chapters – whatever name we give it, what matters is to leave in the past the moments of life that have finished.”

Now that the fellowship is over and no matter how painful the goodbye, it is indeed time to let go and move on to the new and exciting experiences that still await us. For those of us who have graduated, it is time to find our passion and develop our careers. For others, it is time to go back to school, get immersed in their studies and extra-curricular activities, and share with their peers the insights they gained from the fellowship. But even if we have closed this cycle of our lives and gone on different paths, the impact of the fellowship remains etched in our hearts. I find it amazing how the fellowship continues to have an effect on my own life and on the choices I make even after it is over. Not only do I now have a greater knowledge of ASEAN, I also have greater concern for its affairs. The fellowship has made Southeast Asia, which was previously abstract, very real and concrete to me. I now care more deeply about Singapore, Thailand, Cambodia, Indonesia, Malaysia, Vietnam, Laos, Myanmar, and Brunei because they are no longer just any countries – they are the homes of my friends.

Traveling is a joy when you have generous friends to take you around!

Hanoi, Vietnam. December 15, 2004.

In the beginning of the fellowship, we were asked to write a letter to ourselves. This letter was then mailed to us at the end of the fellowship to remind us of where we came from and of how far we had come. A few days ago, I received that letter in the mail and as I read it again, I realized why it was so hard for me to say goodbye to my friends at the end of the fellowship. In that letter, I promised myself that I would build deep and meaningful relationships. However, I didn’t know at the time that to build relationships entailed a great risk on my part – the risk of being truly open, being vulnerable, getting hurt, letting others see my weaknesses, and allowing myself to love and be loved in return. Looking back at the experience now, I see that the only reason I had the courage to take that risk was because the other fellows took that risk with me. On the last day of the fellowship, one of the fellows told us that the fellowship “ruined his life”. I agree, because it ruined my life too – but in a good way. Indeed, being in the fellowship and building bonds was a risk worth taking because though the fellowship had to come to an end, I know that the friendships we have formed will continue to affect us in deep and profound ways.

Right now, I have no way of knowing what other effects the fellowship will have on us in the future. I have no doubt that in time, each of the fellows will be great political leaders, businessmen, teachers, ambassadors, and true inspirations in their own spheres of influence. I cannot predict when or under what circumstances our paths will cross again. All I know for sure is that beyond this world of endless goodbyes, the fellowship will live on.

Batch 2004 Fellows at the 2nd SIF-ASEAN Alumni Conference in Singapore. April 8, 2005.

Starstruck: My First Week at Work

2005-03-20T21:07:00.000+08:00

I never realized that being "the new kid" isn't easy. I studied in the same elementary and high school for 12 years so I never got the chance to experience being the new kid. When I entered college, all the freshmen were new kids so we were pretty much on the same boat. When I joined orgs, or even when I went to Singapore, I was with other people who were also experiencing everything for the first time so I never felt completely out of place.

I started my new job this week and for the first time, I am the new kid! I am the new editorial assistant of Candy magazine and I am joining a strong, six-woman team who have been together for many months, even years! It's like trying to join a barkada and not quite knowing where I fit in. For my first three days, I have been reading and documenting past magazine issues, answering the phone ("Candy, hello?"), and basically doing whatever they tell me. I also attended an editorial workshop which was interesting, but like English grammar class all over again!

The highlight of my first week at work was definitely the Candy Rap Awards 2005. There were a lot of great bands like Spongecola, Kjwan (Marc Abaya is hot!!!), Hale, and Parokya ni Edgar. A lot of celebrities and models were there too (there was definitely no dearth of cute guys)! But my personal favorites are the first batch of Starstruck Teens! I finally got to see Mark, Jennylyn, Rainier, Yasmien, and the others in person! Rainier is such a cutie!!! I don't care if people say he can't act, sing, or dance. His heartwarming smile is enough to leave me starstruck! (Okay, I think my sisters and my friends are going to disown me now!) It was definitely a fun night (not to mention I was sitting in the VIP section -- a mere 15 feet away from Rainier!), but it would have been better if I had experienced it with equally starstruck friends who would scream and be kilig with me!

Tomorrow is the start of another week at work. We're brainstorming for the next issue and I'll get a chance to attend some photo shoots. I just hope I get over the "new kid syndrome" soon. It's ironic how working in Summit may seem like the "safe" choice because it's so near my house and a lot of people are from my school... but the truth is, it's a great leap from my comfort zone. It requires me to be more assertive and independent. It may not be as far as Singapore, but I don't have the fellows to rely on here, I must rely on myself. It's time to let the Sagittarius side of me emerge! After all, I'm a Candy girl now! Til the next update!

Cruisin' with Celebs: Me and popular Pinoy band, Parokya ni Edgar. March 19, 2005.

Bicol CLC: Transforming Lives

2005-03-12T13:30:00.000+08:00

The region of Bicol, located in the east central part of the Philippine Islands, is considered to be the second poorest region in the country. Its vast farmlands, rich natural resources, and smiling people, however, would make you believe otherwise. My adventure begins on the eve of March 3, 2005. Together with six graduating seniors from the Ateneo Christian Life Community (ACLC), I boarded a bus going to Naga City and embarked on an exciting journey.

Being a member of ACLC for four years largely defined my college life. It's a place where I matured as a person, developed my relationship with God, and formed deep and lasting friendships. Now that I have graduated, it is time to discern about whether or not I want to continue the way of life that I have tried to live out for the past four years. The trip to Bicol was a chance for my friends and I to be exposed to the larger CLC community and to help us discern about our commitment to CLC.

Mayor with a Cause
We arrived in Naga in the wee hours of the following morning. We were greeted by Mr. Sabas Mabulo, or "Mayor Abang" as he is fondly called. He brought us to the nearby town of San Fernando, where he grew up and which he now presides over. After resting and settling in, he brought us to the municipal office where he told us about the projects he has done for the town, such as building extensive roads and water systems. Being a CLCer, he tries his best to live out the way of life amidst his battles against the NPA, jueteng, and other maladies that come with traditional politics. It has been said that in order to change the world, we must first begin with ourselves and our sphere of influence. Mayor Abang may be a simple man living in a small town, but it is truly impressive how he has made a difference in the lives of his 27,000 constituents, as well as in the lives of the people he meets everyday. (To read more about Mayor Abang and his town, click here.)

Clockwise from left: Mayor Abang, Son-J, Deacon Stan, Ate Salve,

Pearl, Angel, Kekek, Eugo, and Alfie. March 4, 2005.

The Maangas Fisherfolk
Our next stop was to the small, far-flung town of Maangas, a two-hour car ride and a 45-minute boat ride away from Naga City. This time, our guide was Deacon Stan, a veteran CLCer who formed several CLC communities among the fisherfolk, farmers, and indigenous peoples in Bicol. On our first night there, we were amazed because when we looked up, the sky was dotted with a million stars. Without the bright lights of the city, the stars were able to shine in all their splendor and glory. We could actually feel that we were in the Milky Way!

The next morning, we walked around the town and met the members of the CLC community in the area. They talked about their daily problems and concerns - poverty, lack of good education, lack of health services, and others. Amidst all of these, however, they never lacked in hospitality and good cheer. They told us of their experiences with CLC and how it has gradually changed their lives over the last three years. Pay Billy and May Ason, the elders of the community, told us about a time when food was scarce in the village and they gave away their last two bags of rice to the community. Simple and down to earth, their only request was that we remember them once in a while and help them in any way we can.

Of course, the visit would not be complete without a swim in the beach. Later that day, we rode a boat to a nearby island that had smooth white sand and beautiful seashells.

The view from Aguirangan Island. March 4, 2005.

Grass Art: A Testament to Philippine Ingenuity
On the way home from Maangas, we passed by the town of Pili where we met CLCer Mike Dychinco. He and his wife, Dinah, own a business that exports products to countries such as Australia and the U.S. We had the chance to tour their factory and see how their amazing products were made. Employing over a hundred workers and using natural raw materials found only in Bicol, Kuya Mike and Ate Dinah truly make the region proud.

Can you believe that cute little raccoon is made of grass? March 5, 2005.

Naga Pro: A True CLC Community
That night, we had dinner with the Naga Pro community, of which Mayor Abang and his wife, Ate Melyn, are a part. They have been together since their college days in Ateneo de Naga and have dedicated their lives to improving the Bicol region by putting up the Pagbicol Foundation, a non-government organization, and by striving to live out the CLC way of life in their different lines of work. It's amazing how openly we were sharing stories with each other, given that we had only met most of them that night.

Kuya Allan told us the story of how his kidney failed him a few years back. The person who donated his new kidney was Ate Salve, his unitmate. Together, they endured frequent trips to Manila to undergo a battery of tests, which were both physically and emotionally draining. Indeed, it was a lot for Ate Salve to undergo, considering she is not even his blood relative. And yet, being brother and sister in Christ, she gave her kidney wholeheartedly and told us her story with enthusiasm. As Ate Salve quips, "Kung walang community life, it's the end of my life!"

Ate Nancy told us of how her positive actions affect others in her workplace, while Ate Nhorie related how her husband eventually came to join their community after years of struggle. Mayor Abang further explained about how his community encouraged him to run for public office but kept him grounded at the same time. It's admirable how they are able to impart the CLC way of life with others, not by preaching about it (because you can never really explain what it is), but by showing it through their actions.

When we asked them for advice on how we can make our own units as stable and prolific as theirs, they told us the following: 1) Set a permanent time and place to meet; 2) Have a common activity; and most importantly, 3) Wag Bibitiw. Don't let go and don't give up on each other. As Kuya Allan said, "I am an ordinary person living in an extraordinary community." Indeed, they may be simple and ordinary individuals but being a part of the CLC community allows them to lead extraordinary lives.

ACLCers and the Naga Pro Community. March 5, 2005.

Transforming Lives
The following day was another busy day for all of us. After hearing mass in San Fernando Parish, we conducted a recollection for more than twenty kids in Sa Harong ni Lord Retreat House. It was a fun event filled with games, story-telling, and other activities. In the evening, my six companions and I were distributed among the different members of the CLC farmers' community. I stayed in the home of Tatay Lito and Nanay Julie, who told me about how they were able to send their seven kids to school and uplift their lives through hard work and determination. Nanay Julie also told me of her experiences with the CLC community, how she has learned to appreciate and understand the gospel more, and how it has also transformed her own life.

Living in a predominantly Catholic country, Filipinos have always been criticized for using their faith as an excuse to accept their lot and to remain in the throes of poverty. After interacting with the different CLC communities of Bicol, however, it is evident that our faith, when taken to heart, can not only transform lives but can also transform society. Whether it is in a poor fishing village who struggles against economic and natural forces, a wealthy businessman who brings pride to his region, or a group of people who have dedicated their lives to living like Christ, these simple CLCers have transformed their own spheres of influence and many lives have been made better because of it. If all Filipinos did this, then imagine what an even greater country this would be!

Sightseeing Galore
Our final day in Bicol was spent going around the province of Camarines Sur. We visited the Cagsawa Ruins situated at the foot of Mt. Mayon, the volcano with a near-perfect cone. We went to the church that houses the miraculous Lady of Peñafrancia and we also got the chance to visit Ateneo de Naga. Of course, the trip would not be complete without shopping for food and souvenirs to bring home to our family and friends.

Cagsawa Ruins. March 7, 2005.

Our trip to Bicol was certainly an enlightening and grace-filled experience. Seeing how generously the different CLC communities give of themselves certainly makes the decision to commit to CLC a more challenging and thought provoking one. I am thankful to my companions, Kekek, Eugo, Alfie, Jody, Pearl, and Son-J for being with me on this journey; to ACLC for organizing the trip; and to Deacon Stan, Naga Pro, and the fisherfolk and farmer communities for generously hosting us.

Thank you too for sharing the experience with us by reading this entry. Your comments are most welcome! (To view more pictures of our Bicol adventures, click here.)

A Time for New Adventures

2005-03-01T13:20:00.000+08:00

Around this time last year, I graduated with honors from a reputable university in the Philippines. I had a clean slate once again and the future awaited with open arms. However, no amount of studying, socializing, planning or praying could have prepared me for the months that came after. I was literally a lost soul. I could not properly enjoy the summer months after graduation because I was jumping from one job interview to another and worrying about whether or not I would get a job that I would enjoy, or that would pay a decent salary, for that matter. As I sat in front of the television during my Friends, 24, and CSI DVD marathons during those hot summer months, I feared the unknown and I felt anxious about the lack of stability and familiarity that I had grown accustomed to in college.

Fortunately, around June, I found out that I had been accepted to the SIF-ASEAN Student Fellowship 2004. It was a program sponsored by the Singapore International Foundation that allowed me to study in a Singapore university for one semester, interact with students from different ASEAN countries, and travel around the ASEAN region. The program was just what I needed to get me out of the rut I was in. After a flurry of despedida parties, I flew to Singapore filled with hope and enthusiasm. My stint in Singapore was certainly an unforgettable and momentous experience. I built relationships with amazing people, took risks, and did things I had never done before.

Going back to the Philippines after five months in Singapore was tough for I terribly missed the people I had grown to love. But coming home was also good because it allowed me to catch up with my family and old friends. For the past two months of the new year, I have done nothing but go out for lunch, dinner, movies and weekend trips with old friends, and e-mail or chat with the new friends I left behind. Now, exactly a year after graduation, I am ready to enter the work force and embark on my next adventure.

I just hope that this year will be as memorable as the last.

A view of the crater lake inside Taal Volcano. February 26, 2005.