To Hell and Back Again

The adventures of a mountaineer wannabe

One of the things on my to-do list is to climb a mountain. I wanted to join the Loyola Mountaineers back in college but I was way too intimidated by their tryouts, which involved running ten laps around the huge Ateneo campus. The opportunity to fulfill this dream was presented to me a few weeks ago by Alman during our Pinoy SIF Alumni gathering. Without knowing exactly what we were getting ourselves into but spurred by our common desire to find adventure, Maida and I readily agreed to join him in AMCI's Basic Mountaineering Course 2005.

Needless to say, our Physical Trainings have not been easy. We had our diagnostic test in Ultra two Sundays ago. We had to get up at six-freaking-am to do a twisted version of Taebo and run four rounds around the track under the heat of the sun! And then we did a variety of exercises like push-ups, lunges, squats, calf raises, and more. The past two Wednesdays, I drove all the way to Makati in the pouring rain and got lost both times (you live, you learn). We had to run around Makati under the rain, go up and down five flights of stairs, and do various exercises at a carpark (a carpark!). If fatigue from the training doesn't kill me before the actual climbs, pneumonia, asthma from the pollution, getting a disease from lying on the carpark floor, falling on the slippery roads, or getting hit by the speeding cars around Makati might just do the job! Last Wednesday, since Maida and I were late again, the other trainees had already started running when we arrived. By the time I was on my second run, I was literally at the back of the pack. Actually, there was no more pack to speak of. They had all finished the runs and I was left to walk back to the carpark alone (I couldn't jog anymore). I felt like crying. Sometimes—no, most of the time—I think, "What the hell did I get myself into?!?!"

You know, it's funny but this whole experience actually reminds me of the first time I joined ACLC. Everything was so new and scary. I didn't think I could fit in with all the boisterous members and my fellow applicants (in AMCI's case, we're called "trainees"). Many times, I felt like quitting, giving up, taking the easy way out. But I didn't—and my time with ACLC turned out to be the most fulfilling four years of my life. I'm not giving up on AMCI either. I will improve! (We'll see who's at the back of the pack in a few months!) I mean, this is all about breaking barriers, fulfilling my dreams, and pushing myself to the limits—just as I did when I joined ACLC or when I lived in Singapore for five months. (Of course, it's also about literally climbing a mountain and appreciating the beauty of nature and of the Philippines). It's not just about improving my physical condition either. It's also about improving my driving skills and my sense of direction (I hope I have one by the end of the course!), learning to follow my intuition, and interacting with all sorts of people (I mean, this group is just as diverse as the ASEAN fellows!). I really want to finish this—to prove that I can do it. That I, who am admittedly quite maarte (is it that obvious?), can actually LIVE through this experience! In the words of our fellowship song, "Reach for the stars! Fly high as you can, brave the wind, move the mountain, YOU CAN DO IT, YES, YOU CAN!"